My baby turns one

Yo Yo Yo!  Listen up!  Today is Callum's first birthday!!

If it's even possible, I think this last year went by faster than the first year with Logan.  Is that possible?

At the start of my pregnancy with Callum, everyone talked about how Logan's labor was so intense, and fast, and amazing, that I'd probably have just as fast and intense of a labor with Callum.  I have to admit, I even set my own self up for this expectation.  Why wouldn't I, right?

We were worried that he'd also be breech, so we kept an eye on things to make sure he was head down toward the end of the pregnancy.  But, after that, it was that edge.of.your.seat.endless.waiting that I experienced toward the end of the pregnancy where every little twinge or pain had me thinking, is this it?

Callum has done a phenomenol job at reminding us, day in and day out over the last year, how very different he is from his older brother.  It's been eye opening and sometimes surprising, which is actually kind of silly.  We really should have known, since his entrance into the world couldn't have been more completely different.

How so?

Let me recount my little baby's Labor Story and you tell me.


Monday, 19 April 2010, 1:30am

Jon checked on Logan who woke up in the middle of the night.  He also let Grover out to pee.  I felt a small "gush" of wetness.  Did my waters just break?  Too tired to really check or care.

2:30am
I got up to go to the bathroom and my pantiliner and underwear were wet all the way through (unusual).  It didn't smell or look like pee, just a clear liquid.  I also started feeling verrrrry small contractions.  But, what did I know?  This was not how things happened with Logan so I climbed back into bed to see how things would progress.

3:00am
I decided to start timing my contractions.  They were not consistent at all.  How strange, I thought.

Still, I started getting nervous and excited.  Could this be it?

To add to my suspicions, I pooped and had diarrhea twice (ack!).  I was very tired but I couldn't sleep... I was a bundle of nerves.

4:30am
I noticed some blood when I wiped after a visit to the toilet.  I decided to wake Jon at this point, since I believed my waters had probably broken.  We started getting stuff ready to head to the hospital and called my parents.

5:00am
I decide to take a shower to relax.

5:10am
I poop in the shower (ugh!), but hey that just means I'm not going to poop on the birthing table right?

5:12am
I wonder when the house cleaners will be by next, to make sure the shower is sanitized before we use it again.

5:30am
My parents arrived.  We talk and I'm worried that I can still walk and talk through my contractions.  They just aren't that serious or painful.  Uncomfortable but nothing major.  I'm still tracking them on my app too, and it's just not very consistent.  Why exactly are we rushing to the hospital then??

6:37am
We finally leave but not without my mom snapping a few pics to commemorate the event first.

6:42am
I make Jon stop at Jamba Juice.  This definitely feels slower than Logan's labor and I'm STARVING.

7:10am
We check into the hospital.  They hook me up to everything.  Contractions are coming in every 3-5 minutes (as I had been charting on my handy dandy app all morning long).

8:00am
A nurse finally comes in to check on my progress.  I'm at 3cm - ONLY!!  UGH.

This is looking like a VERY long labor ahead of us.

She also confirmed that my waters had NOT broken (which I had sworn they had).  However, after briefing my OB, she asked me to stay and walk the hospital halls every 30 minutes to help speed up the labor.  My doc told the nurse to check me again in 2 hours - thinking that the labor would probably pick up very soon (especially given my history with Logan).

So, I walked up and down that damn hall countless times.

One of the nurses (a guy, of course) told me that about 17.5 laps would equal 1 mile.

I have no idea how many laps I did do.

10:00am
The nurse comes in like clockwork to check my progress.  I'm at an unbelievable...

4cm.

*sigh*

I do the math.  At two hours for every centimeter.... that means I'm going to have a LOT longer to wait.  I get irritated and frustrated and start thinking, well this is just plain stupid.  It's going way too slow.

So, I'm going home.

Nurse:  You're doing what?

Me:  I'm going to check out and go home.  I'll come back when things get more serious.

Nurse:  You really shouldn't go home.  4cm is far enough along to stay here so we can continue to monitor you.

Me:  Yeah, thanks but no thanks.  I'll be more comfortable at home and I can see and spend more time with Logan.

Nurse:  Well, it's up to you.  But we really REALLY discourage it.

Me:  I understand.  Hey, can you untie this damn gown?

Nurse:  PLEASE come back AS SOON as your contractions get ANY worse.  PLEASE!!

Me:  No problem.  My husband will make sure of it.

So, we check out and head home. 

And I am SO glad we did.  I ate a little lunch, took Grover for a walk and then laid down for a glorious nap (I was really tired).

2:00pm
I woke up from the nap because my contractions were coming on a little stronger.  I could still talk through them but they were definitely stronger and more uncomfortable than before.  We were afraid if we waited any longer at home, it could start getting pretty late into the labor so we decide to head back to the hospital.

4:00pm
We check back in at the hospital (two hours later!).  The staff is confused why there are already records for me in the system. 

Yeaaaaaaah.  We were here earlier in the morning but decided to go back home.  And now we're back!

My contractions were still a bit irregular but not as much as before.  We settle into our (same) room to continue the waiting.

4:30pm
Nurses came in to do an exam.  I'm at a whopping 6cm.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!

So, back to the endless waiting and walking the hospital halls.  How flippin' frustrating.

6:15pm
My parents stop by with Logan for a visit.  It was so very wonderful.  He was a little scared - unsure of things and didn't like seeing me in the hospital bed.  He wouldn't even sit with me in the bed.  He also didn't like seeing the IV in my hand (can't say I blame him!).

Our last family shot before Callum is born!

We tell Logan it's time for him to go home.  :(

Seeing Logan (and my parents) out

8:00pm
While the visit from my parents and Logan was really great, we decided they should probably head home to put him to bed.  I walked out with everyone to say goodbye (which was really rough for me, let me tell you).  Jon left with them so that he could grab some dinner (I had nibbled on the hospital food but he wasn't buying it).  And, I continued walking up and down the hallway, waiting for him to get back.

On my way back to my room (my room was on the very end of a long hallway), I saw my doctor walking toward me.

Doc:  How're you doing?

Me:  Hanging in there.  I'm doing ok, but really tired.  It's been a long day.

Doc:  Yes, it has.  I think it's time to break your waters and help speed things along.

Me:  Sounds good to me.  How long will things take after you break them?  Jon's out grabbing dinner and I want to make sure he's here.

Doc:  How long until he gets back?

Me:  He just went around the corner to grab a bite to eat.  He should be back in about 20 minutes I guess.

Doc:  It'll speed things up but not THAT fast.  We should be good.

8:30pm
I am SO ready.  I waddle back to my room and immediately text Jon to let him know.  He says he's already on his way back to the hospital - which is a relief, I definitely don't want him missing a thing!

8:34pm
My doctor checks my progress.  I'm only at 7 flippin' cm!!  :(  So, we go ahead and break my waters.  It was really uncomfortable (she had to tilt the bed back and up to get a good "grip"), but once she did it I immediately felt the warm gush of liquid.  It was ridiculously fast and then she was gone.

8:38pm
Jon arrives.  The doctor already broke your waters?  What the hell?  You JUST texted me!!

I know.

So, we try walking again.  This time, I barely make it down the hallway and I can feel the contractions intensify immediately.  They've really taken hold!

We go back to my room and I lay down again.

The rest of my labor is a blur.  I had extremely forceful contractions - they were very painful and uncomfortable.  I felt sick and nauseous and could never get comfortable - they were hitting me in tremendous non-stop waves, and never letting up.

My entire body was shaking.

I was also going through these ridiculous hot and cold sweats.  I'd be burning up hot one minute and then freezing the next.  I had a hard time concentrating - all I could do was focus on Jon's face and squeeze his hand.

9:00pm
The nurse comes in to examine me.  We're at 8 cm - yay!

~ 9:30pm
We're at 9 cm - thank GOD!!

~ 9:45pm
It's exhausting and excruciating.  The pressure is unbelievable.  I'm writhing and groaning in pain and starting to feel the pressure come so strong that I HAVE to push.  I can't stand it, so Jon calls the nurses in.  They check me and immediately run out to get my doctor.  I can only assume he was starting to crown.

Me:  Is he coming?!  I HAVE TO PUSH.

Nurse:  Try not to push.

Me:  Yeah right!  I HAVE to push!!

Meanwhile an army of nurses are setting everything up around me.  A lot of commotion and hustle and bustle while I am trying with all my might NOT to push.

10:00pm
Everything is finally ready and I can't wait any longer.  I am literally WAITING for the green light.

Doc: Okay Bree, get ready to push!

With one BIG long push, I manage to get Callum's head out.  Searing, burning pain.  Unbelievable pressure.  Nurses are telling me to breathe and stop screaming.

Yeah right.  Just shut the fuck up please.

Next push, one shoulder comes out.  YES!!  Now the other slides out.  And the rest of Callum's body flops out without any time to lose.

I can't see him yet, but I can hear him.  He's crying almost immediately.  I look over at Jon - he's got tears in his eyes and on his cheeks.

And then suddenly I have this wet slimy slippery baby on my chest.  A BIG boy!  He's heavy, solid, and a squirmy little guy.

I can't believe it.  We're done.

Callum Oliver made sure to take his time but he's finally here.

My doctor calls the time of birth at 10:14pm (Jon thinks it was actually earlier but hey, who's counting!).  She then asks me to give a few more pushes to deliver my placenta.

I give a couple more pushes but can tell they are really weak and feeble.  I have absolutely NO energy left in me to do a damn thing.

I tell my doctor I can't.

Doc:  Yes you can.

Me:  No really, I can't.

I had no strength left in me - I had just given everything I had, literally, to Callum.

She makes me try one more push while she helps to pull on the umbilical cord and POP!  It detaches from the placenta.

Ummmm, pretty sure that's not good.  :(

My doc orders a muscle relaxant to calm my uterus down (and likely calm me down too).  I see the nurses pushing it into my IV and then feel the meds hit me instantly.

At the same time, another nurse has Callum positioned on my chest to begin nursing.  He takes to the boob instantly like a champ.

A few minutes later and my doc delivers my placenta.  It was VERY uncomfortable (she's pressing and pulling on me HARD) and it hurt like hell, but when she's finally done, a wave of relief washes over me.


I look over at Jon.  I'm so full of love, and yet I have no words (or energy) to express it.  He's just as emotional, eyes brimming with tears.  We don't say anything but he kisses and squeezes my hand.

And we stare down at our little Callum Oliver, full of wonder, amazement and joy.

Happy birthday Callum - we love you with all of our hearts.

2 months old

I already wrote a significant amount of updates on Callum's growth yesterday - but today is his actual 2 month birfday, so why not add a few more to the list? :) I'll keep this short because HEY! We have Toy Story 3 to go see in a little bit!

I'm starting to see Callum set a sleep schedule. Slowly but surely. He's taking between 1-2 morning naps and 1-2 afternoon naps. Similar to Logan, he seems to like going to sleep for the night somewhere between 8-9pm. He actually starts getting really tired around 7:30pm but he really takes awhile to go down these days. I think it has to do with this other development of his - awareness and staying awake for longer periods of time - because all he wants to do is be in the middle of all the action, with everyone in the family! :)

Once I'm able to finally get him to sleep (which, let me tell you, is a feat when I'm also trying to get Logan ready for bed at the same time, and Jon is usually still at work or driving home), he'll sleep for about 3-4 hours at a time. It's not bad, I'm definitely getting more sleep than I was with Logan, but I'm now looking forward to longer periods of sleep. ;-) Last night was one of those times, as he finally fell asleep about 9:30pm and didn't wake up again until a little after 3am. I, of course, didn't get to bed until about midnight (oy!) but still. I'm glad he's starting to sleep for longer stints! (it could have also been because of his rough day after his shots yesterday)


He's also got the grabbing reflex down pat - snatching a fistful of my hair and holding on tight. He can't grab things purposefully of course, he doesn't have that kind of control, but when anything brushes up against his little fingers, he clings on for dear life. He has also started smiling more and more - it's so fun to see! He particularly lights up whenever I'm on the phone - I'm not sure why, perhaps my voice sounds different to him when I'm talking into the phone vs. to him? But he seems to like it. Now that he's getting more comfortable smiling at me, I've noticed him doing it with others too, like Jon, Logan, and my mom and dad. It's fun to see him begin recognizing the family!


The other day my mom was over visiting for my Stella & Dot Party and stayed a bit afterward. Callum was having one of his rough episodes where he was clearly exhausted, but just couldn't fall asleep on his own. She took a turn at trying to soothe him but it just wasn't working. When she finally gave up and handed him back to me, he just rolled over, turning his head into my shoulder with the most relaxed and calm look on his face like he was finally home (so says my mother). I could tell he immediately relaxed once he nestled into my chest too though, and it was awful sweet. I do worry he's getting so used to me that he's going to have a hard time being with, or falling asleep with, anyone else. But I guess we still have time to get him accustomed to others. ;-)


In other news, I'm doing well myself. Within this last month, I had my 6 week post partum checkup with my OB and all is well. The meds she prescribed for me to beef up my milk supply have helped a little, but not near enough that they should. So, after my last prescription ran out, I didn't bother renewing (my insurance doesn't cover the meds at all, so it's an expensive "drug experiment" that isn't giving us much reward). She wanted to try one more time, bumping up the dosage on the meds a bit higher to see if that would give me the extra kick I needed. It did increase my supply a tiny bit more, but again, not enough (especially since Callum's appetite has also increased!). I'd say I produce about a third of his intake, which really isn't all that much unfortunately. :( So again, I ran the course of the prescription but have opted not to renew. I'm continuing to nurse however, and will do so until my milk supply runs out all together.

A few days after Callum was born, I had a really rough time sleeping at night. It wasn't because of Callum, but rather, my body going through emotional and hormonal ups and downs. But I also noticed that when lying on my back at night, and sometimes sitting up, I would get these piercing pains in the middle of my back and around a bit to my chest. It was favored on the left side, and as I lay quietly on my back, I noticed the pain would increase with the beat of my heart. It was a little worrisome, since I didn't have anything like this with Logan and seemed to be linked to my heart....

So I went in for a couple visits to see my OB - both times, she checked me out and said nope, your heart is fine. You probably just sprained a muscle or perhaps bruised your ribs (which apparently can happen after a strenuous labor). She didn't think I had broken my ribs (which has also been known to happen in labor), since she thought I'd be in more pain than I was. But regardless, there's not much you can do for broken ribs anyway but wait it out, so it didn't really matter. I was told to just take it easy and try not to not lay on my back (which I had stopped doing) since that seemed to aggravate it more.

After about 5-6 weeks post partum, my lower back pains were also returning. Not as painful as before, but I could feel it. I decided to go see my back doctor and ask him to send me back to physical therapy. I just visited both of them a week or so ago, and mentioned the strange mid-back pinching I've also been experiencing since Callum's birth.

Long story short ;-) it turns out I have about three discs in my mid back that are rotated out of place. When lying on my back, there's extra pressure from my ribs and rotated discs to irritate some nerves, and cause my muscles around there to contract, trying to protect the area.

Luckily, it's not a heart issue. Unfortunately, it's another back issue! They think that the injury most certainly happened during labor, but leaving it to fester the following 6 or so weeks didn't help. And, hey guess what, hunching over to pump or nurse ALSO doesn't mesh well with a bad back. *sigh*

Thankfully, my PT is able to work wonders and she's already improved the area about 50%. So, I'm back to seeing her between 1-2 times a week to work on my trouble areas. I'm continuing to go out on walks with Callum and Grover or, if Callum lets me, do a more active workout at home. All of this combined SHOULD get me back into tip top shape! We can only hope. ;-)

Announcing....

Our second son, Callum Oliver Shipman.


Logan's baby brother was born Monday night, April 19th, at 10:14pm PDT. He weighed 7lbs, 12oz and measured 19" long. Though he's smaller than Logan was, he seems so much chunkier! I think it's the short Chinese/Mexican genes that make him appear so much heavier than he really is. ;-)


I thought I'd hold off posting about Callum until we actually had some time to decompress once back home (we came home this afternoon), and allow me the time to put my thoughts together on his labor and delivery. But, I'm realizing that may not happen soon enough - so a short announcement will have to do for now. :)

One of these days, I'll get around to writing up a few more details on his birth, I promise.


In the meantime, let's just say Callum has made his own entrance in the world unique and not at all similar to Logan's. He's going to be a tough contender to his brother, that's for sure.

And I wouldn't expect it any other way.


Welcome to our family Callum - we love you and can't wait to watch you grow and develop into your own.


(Most pics are courtesy of my mom and dad, until I have a chance to post up a gallery of some of our own - Thank you Zafu and Zabuton!)

Turtle Soup

To most people, at 37 weeks today, I'm finally full term (although there's some folks, like my OB, who considered me full term as early as last week). It's nice to know we won't be running any risks with the baby if he decides to show early.

I've been doing pretty good, feeling great overall, and feel like I'm managing the pregnancy well these last few weeks. I'm just now getting over the head cold I caught from Logan last week, which is good because the congestion, combined with my constant pee breaks in the middle of the night, was really disturbing my sleep.

I've also been managing through Braxton Hicks for a few weeks now - but just within the last couple of days, I've noticed they've really kicked into high gear. They're much more frequent (to the point that I sometimes don't feel a break between them), and much stronger.

Don't worry, I'm not yet in labor. ;-) But, my body is absolutely getting ready.

My OB appointment today went fine - weight gain, blood pressure, baby's heart beat, all check out ok. My cervix is extremely thin and the baby's head is right where it should be, sitting on my pelvis. I also passed my mucus plug this morning - which might be more info than you wanted to hear - it certainly was for Jon. ;-) But, it suddenly lit a bit of a spark in his eyes.... and he's now decided we're going to see this little guy within the next week.

We'll see. You can have contractions and pass your mucus plug sometimes days, and sometimes weeks, prior to labor. So there's no real indication.

Still, he asked me if, same as last time, I don't want an epidural this time around? I confirmed.

So he then reminded me , Okaaaaaay. But if you change your mind, just remember, the safe phrase is "Turtle Soup". I'm not going to get you the epidural unless you say that phrase.

Got it.


Why "Turtle Soup"? I have no idea. I guess because it'd prove I really want the drugs rather than just screaming out in pain? Who knows. This is just how my husband's mind works.

Text 4 Baby

A couple of months ago, I signed up for these regular baby reminders (from Text4Baby) via text to my phone. They aren't particularly mind blowing or helpful to me, since I've gone through this before, but I can see how it would be a neat service to have the first time around. And regardless, they are still fun little reminders that get sprinkled into your day throughout the week.

A few minutes ago, I received today's text:

Delivering early is only wise if your doctor says you need to. Waiting until at least 39 weeks gives your baby more time to develop & gain weight.

I chuckled when I read that last part.

Logan was two weeks early and though he entered the world butt first, he was a healthy 8lbs, 6oz. Can you imagine how big he might have been, had he waited another two weeks? I guess you could say I'm not too worried about baby #2's development or weight gain. I was so glad Logan came when he did and am totally comfortable with the idea that this little guy could arrive a couple of weeks early as well.

Particularly on days like today, when he won't stop kicking my torn linea alba or dancing on my bladder.

Possessed

This morning as we were getting ready for work and school, Logan found one of my cough drops on my bedside table. He was so excited, thinking it was a candy and trying to unwrap it. When I asked him to give it to me, he refused and ran away. I chased him down and after several "nice" asks, I finally just took it from him.

Logan was pissed.

After such a nice day yesterday, my demon child reappeared, throwing another one of his mountain tantrums.

I left him to simmer alone in my room and went to the office to check on a few emails. Unfortunately, ignoring him didn't help but instead seemed to upset him more. He seeked me out, yelling at me to "Go away Mommy!" and hitting me in between yells. When he wasn't hitting me he was hugging my leg desperately, with tears streaming down his face.

Dude, I did go away. I'm not exactly sure you know what "Go away" means.

I've often wondered how I'd do, if I quit work to stay home with Logan. The last couple of days I've been grateful for work - my daytime escape - leaving the teachers to deal with my sensitive monster child (of course he's happy and joyful with them). Just yesterday, one of my coworkers was teasing me about something at work and I just looked at him and said "I really don't give a shit. I'm just happy to have a break from my kid right now." He and the other guy with us, both fathers themselves, laughed and thought that was the greatest thing they'd heard all day. They knew exactly what I meant. ;-)

In other news, the hospital actually called and left a message to let me know the H1N1 virus restrictions for kids under 16 has been lifted for the postpartum unit, so Logan will now be allowed to visit his baby brother once he's born. Yay!! And how nice of them to call! They made sure to inform me that this was for the postpartum unit only, and that he still would not be allowed to visit during labor.

To that I respond: HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAAAhhhaaaaaaa. *gasp* OMG how hilarious. No really. HI-LAR-I-OUS.

Robert's a Big Brother!

Jenn and Jarrod welcomed a new little boy into their family this morning and we couldn't be more excited for them! He was a healthy 7 lbs, 8 oz and 20" long! Mama, baby and family are all doing great.

They haven't named him yet, so I hear everyone's calling him "Baba" in the meantime, since that is what his big brother Robert has named him. :)


Congrats guys!! We are so happy for you and can't wait to meet the little one!!

Update: They have decided to name him Connor Austin Jodoin! :)

Steeellllllllla! Stella!

One more post before I take off and get some actual work done around the house tonight. ;-)

Yesterday was a big day for our family because another new cousin of Logan's, Stella, was born!! Stella is the little sister to Logan's cousin Luke and we couldn't be happier for Jon's brother Curtis, his wife Renee (and of course Mr. Luke).

She's absolutely precious; we can't wait to meet her in person! :) Congrats guys!!

Giving Birth to Boys

An excerpt from a recent Dooce post about her daughter's play date and the inevitable pile of toys that resulted.

At one point I was like, wait a minute, how did you guys manage to get this box of games down from the top of your closet, Leta? She didn't say a word and instead slowly tilted her head to the side while slyly turning up the corners of her mouth. And I knew instantly that I should just carry on with my life without being burdened by the answer to that question. I imagine that the exact same exchange happens almost every hour with women who have given birth to boys.

This is EXACTLY what I have in store for me. EXACTLY.

Good-bye

He's leaving me.

I knew the minute I got home and received the news. I just had a bad feeling at the pit of my stomach.

The man who's seen me naked on a regular basis.

The man I share my deepest darkest secrets with.

The man who has shared in my biggest joys and my deepest sorrows.

The man I call when I'm not feeling well.... who calms me down when I'm stressed out.

The man whom, when I found him, I just knew we were the right match.

The first person to see Logan when he was born.

That sonofabitch He's leaving me....

My OB is moving on - and we couldn't be more bummed of the news.

Something about "giving back" through International Medicine and "treating individuals who are often poor, displaced, unloved and ignored" - as if that is more rewarding than delivering automatically well-off babies, born into suburban Silicon Valley homes.

As if.

I suppose it was bound to happen sometime, I just didn't think it would happen this soon. So, what the hell am I going to do now?

(We wish you well, but will miss you dearly Doc. *sniff sniff*)

A Labor of Love

It's Logan's first birthday today. Woohoo!

I can't quite believe it has already been a year. And yet, it has. Everyone jokes about how I'll get to guilt Logan more than any other child in the world, due to the ridiculous crazy story of how he was born and the labor I went through to deliver him.

I've never actually shared My Labor Story, but I figure at one year later, now is as good a time as any....

So, here goes. Hold onto your panties!


Thursday, 6 December 2007

Toward the end of the third trimester, a lot of women experience "nesting" where they start straightening up and organizing their life, their household, essentially getting ready for this new little life to enter their home and family. So, in usual Connally fashion, I take nesting to a whole 'nother level. Let's not just tidy up and paint a few walls blue. Let's BUY A NEW ONE.

Logan isn't due for another 2 weeks so why not move homes? I think it's a lovely idea, don't you Jon?

Yeah, let's do it.

I took off Thursday and Friday so I could pack up our little home. I had been packing a few boxes here and there before then, but these two days were dedicated TO PACK. Imagine my surprise, when I had a lot harder time packing up the house than I've ever had before. Before, I’d slam out a house-packing in a couple days flat, no problem. Now, I'm huffing and puffing and not breathing well at all (I was fighting a bit of a head cold). Plus, this whole BIG ASS BELLY THING is getting in my way.

I put on a belly belt to help hold the weight, which is a little better, but still quite heavy. So, needless to say, I got some of the house packed, but not enough.


Friday, 7 December
We (finally) got official word today that our loans had funded and we were on track to close that afternoon. So, that means we'd get to move into our new home tomorrow!!

I was a little frustrated at what little progress I made yesterday, and with only one day left, I was hell bent on FINISHING. I spent the entire day and night getting ready for tomorrow's move -- staying up until 2:30am in fact, packing up as many odds and ends as I could.

I finally got my BIG ASS to bed. Was I done? No. But, it was all I could do and we had several suckers friends arriving at 10am tomorrow morning to start loading up the trucks with all the big heavy stuff. I figured well, I'll just keep packing tomorrow while all the guys truck our stuff to the new home....

Saturday, 8 December
We spend the entire day, and night, moving from our small little 2-bedroom house into our gigantic beautiful new 3-bedroom home. I was so ridiculously excited and had so much energy it was great.

I'm sure a lot of my energy was actually nervous energy but hey, whatever. :)

After moving all day, we went out to dinner with everyone for Julie's birthday (on the 10th). I was extremely tired by the end of the day, and pretty damn sore. I've been having a barrage of Braxton Hicks for a couple weeks now, and by dinnertime I was having a LOT of cramping and contractions going on.

I had been demoted to a waddling duck, feeling so huge and uncomfortable. And fighting a damn head cold to boot.

BUT. We had our new home. And honestly, that's all I really cared about.

Sunday, 9 December
Jon and I spent the entire day unpacking, doing laundry and enjoying our new home. In my pregnancy journal, for this day, there was a note under the section "For Your Health" which read:

Don't push yourself right now. Just rest, eat well and nurture yourself as the baby's birthday approaches.

HAAAAA!!

I unpacked our bedroom and a few items for the bathroom, living room and kitchen (just enough for us to get by for a few days). At the last minute, after much hemming and hawing and drawn out discussion with my Dad, I decided the room I had originally allocated for Baby Logan and the room for Jon's office, was all wrong. They needed to be swapped.

Dilemma. The office furniture was all piled up in Logan's to-be bedroom, and all of Logan's furniture was sitting in the to-be office. And, I wasn't quite in the position to help Jon move the furniture from one room to another.

Good thing for parents just down the road!

Dad and Jon swapped the furniture between the two rooms and Jon set up Logan's crib. I was feeling a little better.

The last thing I remember that night was relaxing on our futon couch in front of the TV in the living room, a few of the only pieces of furniture and electronics that we had set up/working. We passed out watching TV and woke up to stumble into bed. Good thing I remembered to make the bed with clean sheets!

Monday, 10 December, 4:30am
I woke up in the middle of the night already going through contractions. I was actually dreaming I was having contractions and the dream is what woke me up! So, I’m pretty sure I had started labor while in my sleep and just didn’t wake up until the contractions were more noticeable.

I was really set on staying at home as long as possible before going to the hospital. I didn’t want to be strapped to a bed, hooked up to IVs, and bored out of my mind. I also didn’t want to trek all the way there only to be told I was in false labor and to come back when I was really in labor.

So, I didn’t wake Jon up, but just started timing the contractions and wading through them on my own in bed. Jon was dead to the world, snoring by my side. I didn’t want to freak him out just yet, but wanted to be sure I was actually in labor first.

My contractions were pretty consistent -- about 40-50 sec long, 1.5-2 min apart. This threw me for a loop since they tell you in class “don't come to the hospital or call your doctor until the contractions are about 5 min. apart for an hour”

So I wasn't sure why mine were happening so quickly.

5:00am
After 30 minutes of contractions regularly spaced 1.5-2 min apart, I finally woke Jon up.

Babe, I think I’m in labor…. But I want to wait until at least an hour has passed before we go to the hospital.

And, I’m really really hungry. But, I feel nauseous too.

5:45am
I felt this overwhelming urge to POOP. And, as I sat on the toilet gripping the granite countertop riding through each contraction, I remembered Julie’s tip to me just days before “You’ll start pooping a lot right before labor” and I thought hmm. I must finally be in labor.

6:00am
Contractions were still going strong, same 1.5-2 min apart. So, I got this GREAT idea to go take a shower! Remembering one of our childbirth class teacher’s mantra, "a shower an hour". The warm water was soothing, relaxing and distracting.

It was the first time I had taken a shower in our new house.

6:30am
Contractions were getting stronger – to the point that, I just laid back in bed after the shower, too preoccupied with the contractions to even dress. I finally realized we better go soon since the contractions were getting more and more aggressive and soon I'd be incapable of dressing, getting into the car, walking, etc.

Jon was freaking out just a little that we weren’t at the hospital yet.

"Okay now? How about now? Can we go now?"

He thought I was going to have the baby in bed or in the shower or on the toilet.

Don’t be ridiculous. We're HOURS away from actually delivering!

6:45am
I laid helplessly in the fetal position in bed, still naked with my robe wrapped around me. I couldn’t dress and needed Jon to help me get my clothes on. This is it!

7:00am
I’m STARVING. Let’s stop at Jamba Juice first to grab a smoothie before we get to the hospital.

I actually don’t think Jon batted an eye at that point. Instead he just pulled into the nearest Jamba Juice, left the car running so the air could blow on my face while I panted through contractions and ran into the shop to get me some frozen whipped up sugar through a straw.

7:01am
WHAT THE FUCK IS TAKING HIM SO LONG!

7:02am
Seriously, how long does it take to get a fucking smoothie?

7:03am
Ahhhhhhhhhh. Delicious Orange Dream Machine to the rescue.

7:05am
On Hwy 17 to the Hospital.

Babe, stop jerking the car! Can you drive a little more carefully? I am seriously feeling EVERY. LITTLE. BUMP.

7:10am
Jon called my parents to let them know we were on our way to the hospital. I could hear the giddy nervous excitement in his voice.

7:20am
We arrived at the hospital. I barely survived the “bumpy rough” ride over. I was clearly in no shape to walk. Jon quickly parked in the first space available, jumped out to grab the first person he saw in scrubs and convinced them to come meet us at the car with a wheelchair.

7:30am
This friendly ER nurse wheeled me into the Birthing Center while Jon parked the car. I was still toughing out the contractions as best I could, and trying to down as much of the Jamba Juice before the Nazi Nurses took it away.

7:35am
They took away my Jamba Juice. Damn Nazi Nurses.

7:40am
“Young Nurse” took my vitals and started hooking me up to a number of machines. She measured my blood pressure, oxygen levels, heart rate, Logan’s heart rate and contractions. I couldn’t move during the first set of tests so they could take a “baseline” of the contractions and Logan’s status. Those couple of minutes were excruciatingly long for me.

7:42am
Jon arrived, nervous, breathless, excited, in love.

7:45am
I told “Young Nurse” I better be in labor because I didn’t want her telling me I’d need to turn around and go back home.

7:50am
“Young Nurse” did a quick exam to assess how far along I was. With WIDE eyes she poked her head up from between my legs and informed us that I was already 7.5cm dilated.

You’re joking right?

Nope.

“Older Nurse”, who was in the room reading my vitals, said “Dear, you won’t be going home anytime soon. In fact, get ready to have your baby this morning.”

WTF.

7:51am
“Young Nurse” calls my doctor. Ummmm, you may want to get your ass over here pronto sir.

7:52am
Jon calls my dad to let him know how far along we are. My dad asks if it’s okay to come visit. Jon looks at me, wondering what I’ll say.

SURE. The more the merrier. I really don’t give a shit.

(Funny how contractions will do that to a person.)

7:55am
In the fetal position on the bed, puffing through my contractions while “Young Nurse” tells me I need to lay still for the machines to get another reading.

SCREW THE MACHINES LADY.

7:58am
“Young Nurse” asks if I'm planning on getting an epidural.

Nope. I've gone this far already, I think I'll be fine thank you very much.

8:00am
“Young Nurse” drills me with a million questions about my personal health history. Too many questions, hard to answer. Jon chimes in when I’m unable to. Do you really need to know if I’ve had X, Y and Z in the family?

8:05am
Here, I know you’re in active labor right now but I just need you to sign a few papers for us.

Take a breath and ride the contraction out.

Ok, now sign some more papers.

8:11am
My doctor arrives, quite calm and reserved as usual. We exchanged some meaningless howdeedoo chit chat and then he got down to business and examined me to confirm - yep, I was at 7.5cm.

With a bulging sack about ready to burst.

8:12am
My doctor asked me if we wanted him to break my waters or let it break naturally. I said leave it alone and let it happen naturally. No sense speeding up this insanely fast roller coaster ride any faster.

8:15am
My dad arrived, camera and all. I could hear him reading the machine which could “predict” when my next contraction was going to hit. I could hear him count down when the contraction was about to end. I was grateful he was there to help us out, even if he was clicking a few too many pictures while I was WRITHING on the bed in pain.

8:30am
Another exam (or two, who knows). Progressing quite well, but my waters still hadn’t broken yet. Sack was B-U-L-G-I-N-G. I was definitely starting to feel the pressure.

8:35am
Jon squeezes my hand and tells me he loves me. I love you too.

8:45am
Oh no. Babe, I need to POOP!! What if I poop on the bed, during delivery?

Will you still love me?

(I didn't poop.)

8:50am
My groans are getting louder and louder. I’m sure my neighbor in the room next door could hear. I didn’t really care though.

9:00am
Several exams later, I was ready to push. I wanted to push. I HAD to push. The pressure was unbelievable. I need to get this thing OUT OF ME AND OUT OF ME RIGHT NOW.

I was about 9.5-10cm dilated, yet my waters still hadn’t broke. “Young Nurse” came in and said ok let’s have you do a few pushes to help break your waters.

HALLELUJAH.

9:02am
“Young Nurse” and “Older Nurse” escort my father out of the room. Sir, you can wait in the waiting room now.

My father sits his butt down on one of the chairs in the hallway right outside our door.

9:10am
My mom arrives, just in time to hear me screaming with my first push.

9:12am
And boy did I scream.

I grip Jon’s hand and push with all my might.

POP!

My waters EXPLODED across the room. “Young Nurse” and Jon both enjoyed a refreshing bath.

We laughed for a minute.

Hey did you see how far the water shot out? Wow that was pretty cool. It just exploded all over the room!

Ok, back to business.

9:15am
I thought before I really needed to push. BOY WAS I WRONG. I had this huge urge to push push push.

“Older Nurse” says,

"Now, it usually takes 20 or so tries at pushing before you can get the hang of it, so let's just try one now"

OK. Sounds good to me.

9:20am
About 2-3 pushes later, AND THE LOUDEST SCREAMING YOU WILL EVER HEAR, Logan had descended quite a bit down the birthing canal – so much that, several nurses started running around in circles, calling for the on-call hospital doctor since they were afraid my own doctor wouldn’t get to the hospital in time (even though his office is literally across the street).

20 or so tries my ass.

Apparently, I’m a good pusher.

9:22am
At the arrival of each new contraction, the “Young Nurse” coaches me through another set of pushes.

I hold my breath, push as hard as I possibly can, screaming at the top of my lungs at the same time.

9:23am
In a single breath, the nurses tell me I’m doing a GREAT JOB pushing but if I blow out while I push, rather than scream, I’ll be much more efficient.

Thanks, but I’m in no mood for constructive criticism right now ladies.

9:25am
My OB shows up right away and has me push once and immediately notices that Logan is breech. He mumbles a few things under his breath that I don’t quite hear, but I vaguely notice the commotion it causes as nurses go scurrying about. A couple of them go running out the door frantically, under his orders to find an ultrasound right away.

He looks at me and calmly, but seriously, explains that he believes Logan is breech and he’s not sure if I can deliver him vaginally or not, and that I may need to get a c-section.

Sweat dripping down my face, gritting my teeth at each contraction, and yet I somehow had enough clarity to recognize the situation and tell him I didn’t care and I trusted whatever he thought best for me and the baby.

Honestly, I just wanted him out of me and delivered as safely as possible.

9:26am
Jon quickly stands up and whispers to me that he’s going to get my mom since he wasn’t feeling well. My doctor looks up from me, over to him and says SIT RIGHT BACK DOWN. You aren’t going anywhere. And orders one of the nurses to go get a wheelchair for Jon.

I suppose Jon did look a little green. I told him it was going to be alright, we were all going to be alright.

(Later I learned Jon was pretty upset by the news and apparently had visions of losing his wife and son all in one day).

9:30am
While waiting for the ultrasound, I’m still pushing little Logan out as fast as I possibly can. And, at one point, the nurses are all so preoccupied with the current events, that they’ve left me “stirrup less” and I’m literally in the middle of a contraction with not a hand or body to PUSH against!

So, legs in the air, flailing to find something to get a hold of, I find my doctor’s instrument table nearby and with one thrust send it flying across the floor, and nearly kicking my doctor in the face in the process (while he looked up from my crotch to see what all the commotion was about).

We laughed for a minute.

9:35am
A quick scan of my belly and my doctor confirmed that Logan was indeed breech.

The proverbial bells and whistles went off and all of a sudden our room was swarming with medical personnel.

9:37am
Good thing those hospital beds have wheels. I was moved into the OR in a matter of seconds. It felt like a scene from ER. Doctors were literally jogging beside my bed asking me questions, prepping me for surgery.

I feebly waved to my parents as I passed them in the hallway, panting and pushing my way through each wave of contraction. My doctor noticed them and asked if they were my parents and if I minded whether he gave them a quick update. Sure, no problem.

He hung back a few minutes to let my parents know what all the hub-bub was about, while I continued down the hall toward the tall doors of the OR room. Jon was nowhere in sight, but the nurses assured me they would be bringing him in shortly (in his wheelchair).

9:40am
My doctor consulted with the hospital OB about the situation – they were weighing the pros and cons of whether to allow me to continue to deliver Logan vaginally, or open me up and pull him out instead. There were risks to doing both at this late stage of the game.

Most everyone around me was serious yet alert and ultra focused. I knew that a breech baby was no good, but I don’t think I quite grasped the gravity of the situation. Even while lying there spread eagle in the OR.

I was too caught up in these contractions that had quite a hold on me.

9:42am
“Doctor Clueless Anesthesiologist” soon realized how much of a hold those contractions had on me. As he asked me questions about my health history (again) and what allergies, if any, I had to any medications, I stared blankly in his face and held up a finger motioning him to wait.

I barely had the breath to push thru yet another contraction. I really didn’t have time to waste answering “Doctor Clueless’s” questions. After the contraction was over I’d answer a word or two, and then hold up another finger and say “hold on a sec” and push through another contraction.

And yet, he didn’t seem to get it. And kept asking me questions.

CLEARLY I DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR SURVEY RIGHT NOW MAN.

9:45am
Looks like we’re just going to continue vaginally. Keep on pushing!

9:50am
Bree, you’re going to feel a quick sting here.

Yep, pretty sharp sting doc. Not as bad as Logan’s butt pushing his way out though.

9:52am
And now you’re going to feel a little relief in the pressure.

Ahhhhh. Who said episiotomies were all bad?

9:55am
I feel everything. The pressure is insurmountable. I can’t push hard enough, fast enough, hard enough, fast enough. He wants out. I want him out.

10:00am
The nurses and doctors look up and comment that Mommy is looking a whole helluva lot better than Daddy right now.

Jon was pretty pale.

We laughed for a minute.

I squeeze his hand and he kisses my forehead and tells me he loves me.

10:10am
We’re almost there!! Logan’s butt comes out first.

He poops on my doctor.

10:17am
I can’t describe the feeling, but it’s weird. I feel his legs flop down as they follow his butt. And I tear.

And then his chest, and then his shoulders slide out next. VERY WEIRD. I can feel everything. Every bulge, every pressure, every elbow and knee. His head is the last to exit my body. RELIEF.

Before I know what is happening next, I have this slimy little black-smeared crying baby on my chest.

Logan Avery is born.


I look over at Jon who is by my side and we are both welling up with tears. Pride. Joy. Love.

10:20am
They wheel Jon out of the OR with Logan cuddled in his arms, to do all the initial baby assessments, weighing, measuring, etc. back at our room.


Meanwhile, my doctor was helping me deliver the placenta and trying to stop the bleeding. You think delivering a baby is painful? Try delivering a placenta while your doctor’s arm is inside you pressing as hard as he possibly can with wads of gauze stained dark red.

It took about an hour for my doctor to repair all the damage that was done, while Jon celebrated Logan’s first few breaths with my parents in our delivery room.

I was exhausted, but ecstatic, when we were finally done. They wheeled me back into my room so I could finally hold Logan in my arms.

And drink the rest of my Jamba Juice.

He was the cutest baby I had ever seen, looked exactly like Jon, and he was ours.

As I stared at his precious lips, his long eyelashes and marveled over his head of hair, memories of the past 6 hrs quickly vanished from my mind, forever.

Happy birthday, Logan. We couldn't have done it without you.

Epidural

When my doc said I'd need to get an epidural to manage my back pain, I about laughed myself off the exam table.

Me: "What? An EPIDURAL?!?!"

"Wait a minute. You're telling ME, I've gotta have an epidural just to get through everyday life, because of this broken back of mine.... yet I didn't have to have one, when pushing that sonuvabitch frank breech beautiful darling son of mine outta my nether regions??!?"

Doctor: "Yes, that's what I'm telling you. So, does next Monday sound good?"

Our convo didn't go exactly like that, but that's what I heard in my head anyway.

I had three injections in my lower back today. It turns out, epidural is just the term they use that involves any injection of drugs through a catheter into your epidural space. My epidural today wasn't the kind a laboring woman has during childbirth. Instead of anesthesia, the doc served me up a nice plate of steroids (with a small side of lidocaine as well). It's supposed to help reduce the pain and inflammation of my nerves (that my discs are hitting) SO THAT my PT can actually start giving me some real exercises to strengthen my core. It's a temporary "fix" but buys us some time.

This past week has been really rough for me, I'm not sure if it was the aftermath of our road trip to LA, or if my back is just getting worse, but the shots couldn't have come at a better time. And, altho the procedure itself wasn't particularly comfortable, I'm so glad we did it and am looking forward to finally getting some recovery time in! Wish me luck...

Mama's Midnight (or 3am?) Musings

As I try to comfort my hiccupping son back to sleep, I thought I'd write a few "top of the mind" thoughts to the blog.

• I absolutely love all of Logan's little faces - particularly the ones where he puckers up his lips right after a long feeding
• He's just starting to open his eyes more and more the last couple of days and it's so wonderful to watch him taking in the world. I like to think he looks at me in a dreamy way (or is that just the milk?) - I know I look at him that way. I definitely find myself wasting away hours at a time just looking at him and memorizing all of his features and expressions. I'm in love all over again.
  
• It still hasn't quite sunk in that this little guy was inside me just a week ago. I have these "phantom" kicks in my belly every now and then, and forget - oh wait, you're right here in my arms... and no longer inside me. It's the most bizarre experience.
• It hasn't yet hit me that I'm a mom or that I have a son! For that matter, I haven't quite gotten used to calling the baby "Logan" either. I was just telling friends tonight that when I called into the pediatrician's office to make Logan's first appt, the gal asked for a name - I immediately said Bree Connally - the gal said, uhhh no. your *son's* name. ohhhhhhh right! ;-)
• Everyone asks me if giving birth naturally was the most pain I've ever experienced. It's funny, my first reaction to that question is "no" even tho I don't think I've experienced anything more painful..... but I think what it is is, going thru a natural child birth was manageable and, as painful as it was (don't get me wrong, it was painful for me and the entire birthing ward knew it!), it seems like there could be other things that are more painful, or rather, out of your control and a lot less manageable. Hard to say.
• How does anyone "sleep when the baby sleeps"? When Logan is sleeping, Jon and I are catching up on the rest of the world - Jon runs errands, I do some laundry, we unpack a few more boxes, or just watch some tv and talk to each other. Every minute is so much more precious now.
  
• Porn-star boobs are NOT cool. Particularly when engorged with milk. Who would ever want implants?
• I've learned it's probably better NOT to watch a tv show where something happens to a child, esp. while nursing. I was catching up on TiVO the other night, taking in this week's CSI New York episode. In it, a little boy gets shot and dies. By the time the CSI had to tell the mother, I was bawling and holding onto Logan even tighter than before. Little Logan kept on sucking/snoozing away....
• Having a child together has brought Jon and I closer together than anything ever before. Jon and I have both already had our breaking points where we've done everything we can to comfort and calm Logan down (he gets very upset in the middle of the night for no apparent reason), yet nothing works. The great thing is, we have each other to take turns and shoulder the burden together. I couldn't imagine ever doing this alone! I feel so very lucky having such a loving, caring, attentive and involved husband, partner and friend, as I do.
  
• I have been so wrapped up in learning how to be a mother, with all my attention focused on Logan, that I sometimes forget the trauma my own body has been through only a few days ago. But, Jon has been great at watching out for me - making sure I'm taking care of myself, recovering well, and resting when I need it.
  
• The dogs and cats haven't really been affected by our new family member. I'm not sure if they have just gotten accustomed to a little baby's cries because of our other friends who've all recently had babies? Or, was the move into a new house more of a disruption to their lives, so this is just a minor "aftershock" that isn't as noticeable?
• I miss sleeping next to my husband.
• I don't miss work. (How could you return to work so soon anyway?)
  
• We like to think our son is already a super star. :) Although I know it's just reflexes at this point, I see a smile break out every now and then on his face. He grabs onto my fingers, shirt, pacifier, anything! and holds tight (and holds it to his mouth). He knows the pacifier is definitely NOT a boob and generally will spit it out. He pushes up with his arms and rolls his head around quite a bit - Jon's already scheming when we can start him on football. I think we should wait to see what the orthopedic doc says first. ;-)
  
• Jon disagrees, but I definitely can see how there is a different sound or cry for different things. Logan makes little "piggy" noises when he's trying to locate my nipple to feed. He has these squeaky cooing sounds when he's sleeping and dreaming. He has a super high pitched cry that he uses when he first starts to get agitated or is hungry. That then moves into a full blown out wail that you can hear through the entire house - either when he's getting changed, or we just haven't calmed him down fast enough after the first high pitched cries start.
  
• I'm not liking the whole "milk lady" feeling - is that all I'm good for - a feeding? (and every friggin' 2 hours too)
• On the other hand, I love the "milk lady" feeling. Jon has to get pretty creative in how he plays, interacts and calms Logan down when need be. Me, on the other hand, I have this natural gift and connection to Logan that no one else has. It's so very special and I cherish it like everything else.

speaking of..... I need to get ready for another feeding. moo.

El Nino esta aqui

Bree woke up at 4:30am having contractions. We left for the hospital at 7:00am and she was checked in and being examined at 7:30. She was already dilated to 7cm at that point. No one, including ourselves, could believe it. She quickly dilated to 10cm and began pushing. Her water broke during her first set of pushing. The Dr. was there very quickly, and after a few rounds of pushing it became apparent the baby was breach. Bree was rushed to the OR to continue delivering vaginally, but there was a whole team on standby in case she needed a C-section. She was able to finish delivering vaginally, though needed stitches. She made it through like a champ, and all without any pain killers. Logan Avery Shipman was born at 10:17am on Dec 10th, 2007. He weighed in at 8lbs and 6oz. World beware!

Click on my sexy picture to see my day 1 photo album: